When I was about 40(-)*2 , through my job, I attended a teamwork workshop for total quality purposes. There was an exercise in this workshop that put 3 people together, two of one gender and one the opposite, and it required us to make a team of two in each group in a specific period of time. In my group, we were two women and a man and when the topic was chosen, we both women, tried to bond immediately with the man. The team was made, but the instructor had a very interesting question. He asked us if it ever occurred to us women to make a team together?
Those few words were revelation to me. Up to this day, I don't know why I chose to make the team with that man. I don't know whether it was the stress of the time limitation or wanting to win the test or to prove myself, but I do know that that exercise changed my perspective about my kinship as a woman with other women of the universe.
How? I have thought long and hard about that phrase and to my dismay, I realized that maybe I thought that he was smarter, or he would respond better to me or......
This is neither about woman's rights nor woman's oppression around the world. It is not about Lesbians and the same sex relationship. This is not even about psychology or reasons behind women behavior. This is simply about women who do not feel kinship, sympathy, and solidarity with other women. This is about all women who go through the same feelings and life styles and yet side with men. Shame on us daughters who are future mothers and grandmothers that blame our mothers for every event of our lives and worse yet, sympathize with our fathers who had to deal with our mothers. We are who we are because of them. Shame on all of us girlfriends, that hurt each others feelings, just to spite each other just because we can. Shame on us female genders who still have no faith in each other and still think that men can do a better job.
When I am sick, depressed, troubled and god knows what, I reach for my girlfriends, so shame on me for not endorsing them and standing behind them from the beginning. They are the one who comfort me, advise me and nurture me and shame on me for dissing them and to refuse their friendship. Yes they are hormonal and moody at times, but who better understands them than I do, because I am in the same boat. We let our fathers, husbands, sons and male friends get away with many things, why can't we forgive women for that? Really, why don't we support each other more?
