Because I say so!

Last Thursday, we celebrated Thanksgiving with lots of eating, drinking, and of course shopping across America. We slaved, liked the pilgrims, over the preparation of the food, not growing it, and when the feast was ready, we were grateful for all the blessings in our lives, especially for having the honor of seeing some of our annoying relatives only once a year. Some were grateful for not having to cook, and I was among those that were grateful that did not have to travel. In short it was a perfect long weekend that was too short.

And,

As I was marinating the big bird and preparing all the traditional foods, I walked down the memory lane of all the Thanksgivings with the 4teens.

When 4teen was a preschooler and a kindergartener, I learned the story of Thanks giving with him while he was sometime a pilgrim and other times an Indian.

When she was in tweens, she wanted to know whether the thanksgiving holiday was before or after the time that the Americans killed the Indians.

And now at the peak of 4teen, they both have a moral question. Why should they help anyone in life? The Indians helped the pilgrims and saved their lives by teaching them harvesting in the new land and how to survive in their new adopted home. What did the pilgrims do in return, they captured their land, killed them all and what ever was left of them was confined to the reservations. Moral of the story, see what happened to Indians, this is what helping others get you.

I have pondered over this statement many days and nights. I can not tell them that you have to help others, because I say so. This phrase has stopped working a very long time ago. Part of me knows that their statement is very true. How many times have I been betrayed by those whom I have helped? Many times. How many times have people taken credit for what I have couched and taught them? Many many more times. Yet, I still can not stop myself lending a hand to someone in need. Why?

Because my gut feeling tells me that this is the right thing to do, and I trust my instinct more than any thing else. Because I believe in what Hillel says, "If I am not for myself, who will be for me? But if I am only for myself, who am I? If not now, when?" Ethics of the Fathers, 1:14
This is who I am, and I can not work against my true self. For every time that I have been betrayed by one, I have been helped by another in a different situation. For every time that I taught something, I have learned another valuable lesson. And mostly, because this is who I am.

And the way I see it, helping people is not about them, it is about me. Every time I turn my back on someone in need, I am turning back on my self, and I lose part of what makes me whole, and I do not want to do that. I need to believe that there is still goodness in the world, and by doing good, I am pulling my weight in society. And I do know that there are many people out there like me.

So the 4teens have to take my word for it, because every time he/she will ask me why they should help anyone, my answer will be, because I say so!!